Update: Busy and Blessed Summer

I have not posted on here for quite a while, and I am sure that everybody has sorely missed the details of my life.  :D  The summer was quite busy, but even more blessed.

As about everybody that knows me already knows, I ran for Missouri State Representative over the summer.  We ran a good campaign, worked hard, and met so many great people.  In the end, I fell about 8% short of the needed votes.  All my friends and family were so helpful along the way.  From being in parades to working fairs to putting up signs to going door to door, I had support all along the way.  I get "I'm sorry that you didn't win" pretty often.  While it is great to hear that they are concerned, there is nothing to be sorry about.  First of all, this journey has been filled with blessings--I have met a lot of great people along the way: Once accepted the Lord; Another family started going to church with us.  A lot of young people got involved in this campaign, and this country needs that, young people interested and involved in politics.  Secondly, it is not that disappointing because I was not doing this out of personal ambition.  I know it sounds crazy in politics this day in age, but I truly was running because I wanted to serve the people.  Imagine offering to help someone to move, and they say, "No thanks."  Are you going to be bummed out about that?  I offered my self  and service to the people; they voted that they didn't need the help that I was offering.  Now, I do believe that the people made the wrong decision and that I was truly the better option, but once again big money and lobbyists won out.  However, though I wanted to serve the people, I will be just fine.  I am not out on the street or anything, and I have a teaching career to get back to.  I will keep on doing my best in whatever I do and do it to the glory of God.  I thank all the people that supported me in my campaign and those that voted for me. 

Looking at my previous post, it was about my girlfriend.  Well, as it is clear to see the oncoming from the post, she is no longer my girlfriend.  Tania was an incredibly sweet and beautiful girl, but she was not the right one.  Circumstances were a bit too much for the relationship to survive.  There was no fight, but a friendly agreement that maintaining a long-distance relationship any longer simply wouldn't work. I wish her all the best in her future endeavors, and I am thankful for all the time we spent together, the fun I had and the lessons I learned.

Love Requires Sacrifice Sometimes???

Maybe I am being a fool. Maybe I am too idealistic or have too romantic of  a view of the world and love.

Before I say anything else, let me say that I love my girlfriend. And without her help after my fall, I may not have survived, and I appreciate that.

However, I can feel the relationship between me and my girlfriend slipping away. We have been together for about about a year and 9 months. Am I being too demanding to think that she should at least look for jobs around here or come for a visit? I completely understand that she has to look out for her career and what is good for her, but part of loving a person, in my mind, is being there when they need you.  When I fell and was hospitalized in China, my parents flew over there (and they are not the world traveling type).  I needed them so they were there.  That is what you do when you love someone. Right? Recovering from a brain injury is the hardest thing that I have ever gone through. My girlfriend should at least show a desire to come here. Maybe things wouldn't work out, and the result would be the same--her living and working in France--but it would mean so much to know that she tried to be with me when I need her now. She said that we should just live our separate lives until I am better again; then we can get back together. Sometimes, life gets hard--we have to help each other through those time. That is what community, family, and love are about. Do we just have different ideas about what love is? Or does she not love me as much as I love her? If the show were on the other foot--if she were injured--I know I would be there with her, for her. Ah, c'est la vie, I guess.

Inside My Stubborn Head

"When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did."

Live life passionately, and you will make mistakes--we all do--but there will be nothing to regret. Regret is a funny thing; I think sometimes it takes a while for it to get around to us. Maybe we do something, and at the time we do not regret doing it (or not doing it), but as life passes, we may learn something or the consequences become evident. Then, we regret it. Sometimes, though, we do something and immediately regret it, like yelling at your mom or telling a bigger kid to mind his own business. However, I was thinking about the things that take a bit before we really regret them.

I bring this up because I found a song that I started writing a while back. It was shortly after I had gotten out of a relationship with a girl. I had fallen in love faster and harder than I ever had. Then, I went and did about everything I could to unwittingly mess up the relationship. I had almost moved for her, but I didn't. I was set in my selfish ways, and I was not willing to sacrifice what I wanted for a relationship. Maybe, we would not have made it anyway, but at least we would have known, for sure, that we had given it a chance. What happened, happened.  I am not still hung up on it, but I was trying to give some context for the lines below and also share a very important time in my life. Also, I want to encourage you to take a risk and make that leap--don't let fear or selfishness keep you from pursuing something you desire.

A world of what-ifs reigns inside my stubborn head

I’m sorry was the thought, but it was never said

Second chance of hope, along with fate’s promises broken

The word was on the tongue but never quite got spoken

A man of mystery, too cool to show a grin

The still waters try to hide the panic within

A poem of fallen pride, forgiveness, and unadulterated care

Written and erased without ever being shared.

Watch Out World!

It was a simple act, but I think I really needed to make the Top Moments of 2010 list. Reminds me of how blessed I am. I originally was going to make a Top 10 list, then because I couldn't make one that narrow decided to do Top 20. I have still been coming up with things since then too. Life is good when you have trouble counting all your blessings.

It is taking some time to get used to what all has changed in my life. But I really didn't lost the things that are important. Still have God, my family, my friends, and my mind (I have to say that one because a lot of brain injured people aren't quite so lucky). This whole experience has actually brought me closer to God and my family so, in a way, it is a blessing.

Sometimes, we need a little something to happen to nudge us in the right direction in life...Guess I just needed a little more. With the new year, I don't really have any concrete resolutions, but I want to use this year (and the ones after) serving God and helping people. If there was any reminder to stay focused, I think losing peripheral vision is a good one--focus on what is in front of you and don't be distracted.

It has taken me a while, 7-8 months, but I am ready to move forward with my life. I have spent too much time feeling sorry for myself, getting mentally and emotionally used to what I have to live with, and also doing the needed recovery things; I feel like my life kind of halted. Now, I am ready to kick start it. Don't treat me like a helpless child; don't feel sorry for me--This is me! God has great plans for me. Watch out world!

Words of Advice!

I am just a simple man, but here are a few things that I have learned in my life.

Live with joy!!! --SMILE--  Happiness makes us smile, but also a smile can make you happy, both directly and indirectly. You may be surprised how the physical act of smiling can actually make you feel better. Your brain associates a smile with happiness. Fool your mind; smile and it will think happy thoughts. Also, a smile makes you appear kinder, more approachable, and overall more likable. Trust me, where it be in your professional or personal life, being likable will help you be more successful--which leads to more happiness, which leads to more smiles, which leads to even more happiness--an endless cycle, and IT ALL BEGINS WITH A SMILE.

Learn to work with others. Surround yourself with smart, talented people, and work with them. Face it, you may be smart, but, in everything, there is someone even better. Use their skills to help you succeed. But this in not a one-way street, in the same way, use your skills to help them succeed. There is great truth in the idea that everybody is your superior in someway, and you are to them. Figure out what you have to offer each person. PROSPER THROUGH  PRODUCTIVE  PARTNERSHIPS! Take advantage of synergy; be a team player concerned with group success, not individual success.

NEVER STOP LEARNING! New languages, new interests, new skills. And know the interest of others, and learn about them. Other than just making them feel better, great opportunities can begin with the smallest of connections. Read, read, read!  Read history, read news, read novels, read poetry--just read! Cram all that knowledge in there for a man with many interests is comfortable in any situation and conversation. Broaden your horizons; learn from others; focus on what you are not good at so you can become well-rounded.

OPEN YOUR MIND! Everything--EVERYTHING has more than one side...usually several. If someone disagrees with you, try to understand their perspective. Conflict comes from having different perspectives. By understanding others' perspectives, it can help you relate to other people. Don't be afraid to compromise--there are times that we need to.  Of course, there are times that we shouldn't also. Either way, it is better to understand the other person's point of view. Know your opponents and friends. This can help you build both personal and business relationships. Businesses must have something to offer. What better way to come up with something to offer than by knowing other people and their needs. Sometimes you need to put yourself in their shoes and look at things through their eyes. This will help develop and market products that will appeal to others.

LOSE YOUR PRIDE! Don't worry about what people think about you. Instead of worrying about looking good, BE GOOD! Be intelligent, kind, and successful--then just let people see the real you. Masks and facades fade away. They can hide you for a while, but your true self will eventually show through. Might as well show your true self from the beginning--being good will not just make others think better of you, but you will feel better about yourself. Your confidence will soar! (This is also the dating advice that I give...don't pretend to be the things that they want...be them...usually smart, funny, and considerate are more than a girl/guy can ask for).

LIVE FOR OTHERS! Real joy doesn't come from an individual accomplishment; it comes from helping others. From helping those who are starving to helping those you work with, everybody needs something. Beyond physical needs, people want to feel special. Help other people in your life by making them feel important...nah, don't make them feel important, make them important to you. Put their happiness above your own. And the crazy thing is that this will actually bring you more happiness. If you are able to make others happy and successful, be sure that you will also be.